Why Me?

A couple of weeks and a few dates after I met the parents Bruce said he wanted to talk about something important. Wasn't that the woman's line? We went to a fondue place - most likely the start of my battle with cholesterol - and he took my hand. No simple feat with a pot of boiling oil between us.

"You know we haven't been exclusive, right?", he asked.

OK, I thought, this is it! Another loss...strike three. I'm done.

I think I mumbled something intelligent like, "uh huh"....

He went on quite quickly..."I've been seeing this woman, Sandy, for about four years. There have been quite a few others but I've been seeing her consistently."

WTF? Couldn't you just say we're not seeing each other anymore? Do I REALLY need to hear all of this?

He continued...."I think you and I have a future together. I want to end it with her."

In hindsight, I wonder why he didn't end it with her first and then have the warm and fuzzy talk with me about the future? But I would come to learn over the years that Bruce always loved the back-up plan.

That night I felt elation, joy, excitement and WOW! This is the one, finally!

Breaking up with Sandy was no easy task. Apparently, Bruce had been helping her financially as well as guiding her aspirations as a singer. She was tall, she was beautiful, she was blatantly belligerent about the breakup and she was black. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but while all knew about "Sandy" few had actually met her. This was pre OJ and Nicole, remember. Racially mixed couples caused attention. Sandy had been the "other woman" in the background even though Bruce and his wife were separated.

I remember many phone calls from the answering service during the next several weeks . Again, no cell phones. Then it seemed Sandy accepted the inevitable. They were done. He and I would live happily after. Not so fast, Cinderella. Now that Sandy was out of the picture, the "almost ex" realized that perhaps her role as #1 Woman in Charge might shift. And that did not sit well with her. The drama would escalate whenever we had something special planned. A trip to Hawaii for a Four Preps reunion had been planned. But now the "girls" - his daughters - wanted to go with Dad. Would I understand? Sure, I'll even drive you to the airport. My car wasn't big enough, nor was Bruce's, so I actually drove them in Brenda's - the "ex". You might be thinking, "she's nuts", and I probably was, but at the time I could rationalize just about anything into making sense.

The night before they left Bruce gave me a beautiful gold lighter - smoking was cool then. A song by Debbie Boone was at the height of its' popularity...he'd inscribed on the lighter "you light up my life". I was over the moon.

I brought back the car and Brenda invited me in for a cup of coffee. I think she felt it was time to get to know the one that didn't look like she was going away so fast. As we sat together talking about nothing she took out a cigarette. My lighter was on the table so she picked it up and looked it over.

"Bruce gave you that?", she stated more than asked.

Before I could happily reply she added, "He gives lighters to every one."

Game on, Biatch!